Elevators

Am I the only one that finds this odd? How often I'll be in an elevator and people are having a personal, very personal conversation and I'm forced to listen because after all, we are three people in a 5'x5' box...

I've decided to list some of the oddest conversations and situations I've been forced to endure.

10-People talking about a superior and bitching about her because she has a mole.

9-People comparing tans.

8-Talking about your vacations in an elevator sucks, especially in the dead of winter or (like today) when 20cm of rainfall are expected.

7-People who take half an hour to enter/exit the elevator.

6-People with baby carriages. Why would you bring a baby to work anyways?

5-Bicycle delivery men. Sweaty, smelly, hairy, and with a fucking radio/phone that keeps dispatching someone named Hal to an address in the boonies.

4-People who carry on conversations with someone outside the elevator and keep the door open. We (the rest of the elevator occupants) are happy when you do this. It's quite entertaining to listen to you carry on and on about your kids and how they get along with their new kindergarden teacher meanwhile retarding everyone including me.

3-People on the phone. Cell phones don't work very well in elevators, deal with it.

2-There is this man in my building that every time I find myself in an elevator with him, and some of his co-workers, he keeps complaining about all his other co-workers. If I picked up on this trend, do you not think his co-workers have too? Nobody likes an elevator whiner.

1-Two women in their early 20s, neither of them very attractive, both bitching about how they both hate it when their respective boyfriends spoon them in bed to then get aroused and want to have sex in the middle of the night. My thoughts on the subject are simple, first of all if your boyfriend's advances bother you he should not be your boyfriend. Furthermore, looking like you do (ugly) and with the type of personality you have (bitch) you should be happy you even have a boyfriend.

Please, when in an elevator with strangers, shut the fuck up.