10 reasons why mass transit in Montreal sucks.

10- The douchebag that has no manners, runs everyone down, elbows his way passed old ladies and cripples while carrying a huge backpack, just so he can sit down and play NHL'07 on his laptop while on the train. This is not only rude, it is a can of whoop-ass waiting to open.

9- The annoying obese woman with the squeaky voice, the fur coat and the cell phone. All three are out of fashion.

8- People eating non-snack foods, just like the people at the movies who are having a burrito while we're all trying to watch The Boy In The Striped Pajamas, eating a full course meal in the train is heavily frowned upon.

7- Rude children who go to private prep high-schools, wear ties and suits but behave like complete asses. The parents deserve a slap on the head.

6- Gassy people, people who had garlic bread for lunch, keep burping, fall asleep on their neighbors shoulders, etc. YOU ARE IN PUBLIC.

5- The overall condition of the train/bus/metro cars. Where I live (Montreal) even the newest wagons are 5 years old, and they were rubbish even as they were being built, the doors don't close/open properly, the seats are designed for short travels and anything in excess of 20 minutes sitting down will put your ass to sleep, the windows are dirty to the point where you can barely see outside or they simply have graffiti embedded into them.

4- The scheduling. It sucks. Why is it that at the peak of rush hour we only get a metro every 5 minutes, sometimes you are standing on a pier and you have two empty metros go by the other way, stopping at the empty pier across the rails, while your side of the pier is filled with people and there is no metro in sight.

3- There is no shelter at the train stations and where they have shelter it is on the wrong side of the tracks so that in the morning when the pier is filled with people, they are forced to stand outdoors because the shelter is on the other side of the train tracks, where it is never used because that is the side used to DROP people off in the evening after work.

2- The shelters are too small, the average shelter can fit four adults, two if the obese fur coat/cell phone lady enters. There are also about eight seats available at train stops where on average 50 or more people are standing waiting for the train.

1- The trains are constantly late, and if they are not late you can bet your ass you'll run into one (or more) of the above douchebags in them.

They are late even and especially when the temperature drops below -15°C and/or it is raining/snowing heavily or there is a thunderstorm. Oddly though, they are on time on days where people don't all work, like half-staff days and the couple days before/after the Christmas holidays and the summer vacations.

If you look at their website, they have a STATE OF THE NETWORK link which of course is completely useless to us as we wait outside for an extra 50 minutes by -25°C with no Internet connections.